Im confusing about this religious

Hi, i (30) am deaf man, and also my English isnt best because English isnt my first language so i try my best. Anways, i am now questioning myself like why am i born as deaf or why am i born as black,or why i am here on this earth? Anways i have face the difficulties and it make everything harder for me to accept myself because in my experience as black and deaf person. I met people who called themselves christians hate me because of i am black or they discrimination against me because i am deaf. I read John 9:1-7 and it made me more confusing because Christians seem ok with racism and discrimination. Since Jesus said God created people and gave us who we are. Since we dont make decisions to chose color skins or disabilities but God decisions to give us color skins and disabilities the monent we born. Therefore, its not our fault to be born as color or with disabilities, christians act like its our fault for exist with color skins. For my logic, you as christian hate people because of their skin or disabilities it mean you hate God because God who the one created us and gave us color to glorious God. That why i am not sure about that. I am now reading the bible as curiosity since i grew up and never attend to churches. So you can explain this and correct me if i am wrong about it. Thanks