I feel that I have drifted incredibly far from God and that I don’t even really know what I believe now.

(**I’m writing this late at night so if the grammar isn’t proper, just ignore it**.)

I(f) recently graduated from hs a month ago, and I’m now in full summer mode until I go to bible college in the fall. somethign that I’ve been struggling with a lot lately is reading my Bible, and for the last four months, praying. I think in the last month, I’ve maybe prayed twice before I’ve gone to sleep. I’ve been so lazy and tired and I’ve missed a bunch of church services because of it (I’m the only one in my household that goes).

I’ve been struggling with what to believe lately, and idek if I’ll even be a Christian in a few years and that scares me and also makes me incredibly sad as someone who was “on fire” for God and got baptized last may. I’ve been sinning constantly, specifically with masturbating, as shameful as it is to share it.

I’m thinking I’ll stay home from church today, as my family got back from a vacation just this evening as recuperate. I might watch the livestream.

not sure where I was going with this. Any advice would be great.