Im a bad person

I chose vaping binging and purging over God, I blasohemed the holy spirit and now I’m at the point of no return. I’ve hardened my heart so much and seared my conscience by willingly going against my convictions, now I no longer feel conviction. I don’t have emotions, I don’t feel happiness, love, joy, guilt or shame. I don’t feel anything just an emptiness in my head and a hardness in my heart