Woke up crying again idk what’s going on. (Emotions are pain)_

This is the second time this has happened but this one wasn’t as bad as the first one thankfully but I still wonder why it happens.

What is God doing to my heart? It hurts, stop this pain at once you have already made me suffer enough what more could you want? what tests do you still have yet to bash me into like a ragdoll to a brick wall?

If you gonna be rough we me and toss me around like a sack of potatoes then come on and give me a fight like how you fought with Jacob (or was it Simon can’t recall) but if it takes war with the heavens to get your attention then so be it.

Youve ignored me for what and why? How am I supposed to speak to you if you turned your back to me ages ago? well if you won’t look to me yourself-

Then I’ll make you look.