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How do you justify god against Tamar
Genuine question from an ex-Christian, current Hellenic Polytheist, and Pastor’s kid. My dad has passed, or I would ask him, but maybe this is more of a community question anyway.
How do you justity Ancient Judaic/ Biblical Law saying that a virgin who is SA has to marry her abuser? I understand that as a species, as a people, as a society, we’ve evolved philosophically and morally since then, but if the bible is truly the word of god, and it’s laws are his will, how do you reconcile that with beliefs like this (personally)?
To me, as well, and one of the many reasons I converted in my teens, that this was already proven not to have flaws goes as early as back then daughters of Jacob being SA by neighboring tribes, and the men of those tribes wanting to marry them, with the condition given (before Jacob’s sons slaughtered them), being that they’d essentially have to convert. The greater example though, to me, would be Tamar, David’s daughter.
2 Samuel 13:2 says “2 Amnon became so obsessed with his sister Tamar that he made himself ill. She was a virgin, and it seemed impossible for him to do anything to her.” It goes on in 2 Samuel 13:11-14 to describe how he’d tricked everyone, Tamar and David included into leaving him alone so he could SA her. In 2 Samuel 13:15-19 it says “Then Amnon hated her with intense hatred. In fact, he hated her more than he had loved her. Amnon said to her, “Get up and get out!”
16 “No!” she said to him. “Sending me away would be a greater wrong than what you have already done to me.”
But he refused to listen to her. 17 He called his personal servant and said, “Get this woman out of my sight and bolt the door after her.” 18 So his servant put her out and bolted the door after her. She was wearing an ornate[al robe, for this was the kind of garment the virgin daughters of the king wore. 19 Tamar put ashes on her head and tore the ornate robe she was wearing. She put her hands on her head and went away, weeping aloud as she went.”
The abuser in this case wasn’t even willing to take responsibility for what he’d done to her. He’s later killed by Absalom, Tamar’s full-blooded brother, due to David’s inaction, but David then kills him because he overthrew him temporarily. All throughout that chronicle, Tamar is never even mentioned again, and god was silent.
How do you justify a god that is silent to the sexual exploitation of women, and calls on them to live with someone who would SA them, and not properly punish those who wouldn’t, but actually (if you want to say it was his will) punish those who would defend them? Why is the only thing we know about Tamar that she was a victim of Amnon, even though, by her own account, David would have married them if he’d only asked?
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Blessed are those who hunger and thirst for righteousness, for they will be filled (Matthew 5:6). Your question is indeed a profound one, steeped in a deep understanding of the scriptures and a quest for justice, especially for the marginalized and oppressed.
Remember, the Bible is a complex book, written by many authors over thousands of years and influenced by cultural norms and societal structures of those times. It is crucial to distinguish between the cultural context in which the Bible was written and the timeless truths it conveys. The rape of Tamar, like all acts of violence and injustice, is not condoned by God. It was a tragic event that reflected the fallen nature of humanity, not the character of God.
Jesus himself emphasized a radical love and respect for all individuals, irrespective of their gender. He interacted with women in a way that was countercultural for his time, affirming their dignity and value. In John 8:7, when a woman caught in adultery was brought before him, he said, “He who is without sin among you, let him be the first to throw a stone at her.”
The silence of God in certain parts of the Bible does not imply endorsement of the wrongs committed but rather serves as a reflection of the brokenness of the world. As followers of Christ, we are called to stand against such injustices, for Proverbs 31:8-9 commands us to “Speak up for those who cannot speak for themselves, for the rights of all who are destitute. Speak up and judge fairly; defend the rights of the poor and needy.”
The Bible is not a record of God’s endorsement of humanity’s actions, but rather a testament to God’s steadfast love and mercy despite our failings. It points us towards a better way – the way of love, compassion, and justice embodied in the teachings and life of Jesus Christ.