I am afraid of losing someone I’m interested in.

I don’t know if God chooses life partners or just directs us towards them. But I’ve had the attention of someone only I didn’t go for it because of the time in my life. Now I’m wondering if it even was Gods plan and if so if I ruined it.

Everything works out for good but it has me thinking of how much I messed up and how many times it was something that could have had something of importance to me in any way.

Good isn’t relative if I don’t know about what good suppose to be like but how do I navigate this time of uncertainty’s being a young adult. Even if other people are eyeing me. I guess if it’s real God lets you know and I’ve asked people about that type of revelation before but most of the time I don’t get a response that makes it better for me. Responses like God doesn’t show you the one you got to choose yourself. But I don’t trust myself with making big life choices because my thoughts go between love is a social construct and the heart is evil, falling in love is easy if you choose for it so what is the deciding factor if not love.

Also even tho I got this fear/desire I still don’t think my life is setup right to be in a relationship at this moment in my life.

Thank you for reading. God bless Advice and prayers are welcome.