Biblical Wisdom Ask

I really would like to get Biblical wisdom and to know if I’m just being selfish or if I have a valid decision made.

Am I in the wrong? My youngest sister had an affair with my cousin’s husband, causing them to get divorced. My sister now is with the man. The ex-wife (my cousin) was bitter and it turned ugly with their daughters. My sister couldn’t be alone with her step-kids because of it.

My sister’s youngest daughter accused two my sons with S/A. It never happened. This niece is the youngest in a family in which someone accused innocents of S/A. No punishment was ever done, to my knowledge, so my youngest niece decided she could get away with it, as well. After all of this, that niece was diagnosed as bipolar and is now living in a lockdown facility out of state.

My husband and I decided we would no longer associate with my sister and her family. Because of the way everything went down, with no apology ever being offered, we thought it best to preserve our own family peace.

Today, my mother accused me of being so self centered because we choose not to go to family get-together or anything they turn up to. When I made a comment about wanting keep my mental health away from family drama and stuff, she said I need to grow up and get my stuff together and get over it, because I am tearing apart her family and causing my 94-year-old grandmother distress. I told my mother that I was choosing not to associate with people who are toxic to me and my mother told me that there are plenty of times when I’m toxic to her, but she still associates with me.

I have been seen and treated as the “difficult child” my entire life, even though I don’t feel like I was treated fairly.

Am I wrong? Should I give in to this demand and just get over it?